The Latest Joy Killers
THE LATEST ATTACK UPON HAPPINESS AND JOY IS UPON US. Two “Food Scientists” as they call themselves, (Actually two Dweebs from Seattle) have announced to the world that they have created a “Beanless Coffee” that tastes, they say, “…the way coffee should taste.” In other words these two morons have reinvented “Postum.” (Look it up)
An article from NPR comes close to orgasm lauding this bit of nonsense.
Jarret Stopforth who admits that he has worked for other food companies such as Chobani, and Soylent – he is rather vague in what capacity (I suspect he may have been a custodian or file clerk) and one Andy Kleitsch formed a company named “Atomo!” to sell their noncoffee coffee. Kleitsch who is with the University of Washington has written allegedly unbiased rave reviews of Atomo! and it’s chemical brew.
They have found a solution for a problem that does not exist. So they are working hard to create one.
According to their marketing plan and the Colombia based “International Center for Tropical Agriculture” ( A real exciting bunch. I never miss their swimsuit issue) the amount of land suitable for growing coffee “is expected” to shrink by “an estimated 50% by 2050.” In other words, they made up some figures to justify and promote immediately destroying a worldwide industry, ruining the sustainability of a number of nations and to impoverish countless millions of people so that they can sell their cup of chemicals and call it coffee. They boast that their chemical non-latte latte can be called coffee because of a loophole at the FDA.
This entire farce has nothing to do with coffee, agriculture, global warming as they claim. What this really all about is launching an attack on the coffee producing nations and the big businesses that sell coffee. The more people whose lives can be destroyed and forced into government dependency the better. I’m sure the fact that the folks in those coffee producing nations are largely people of color is strictly coincidental.
What they are brewing isn’t coffee or an attempt at a substitute. It really is a Soylent Brown – something that is a chemical mixture that can be altered by unknown people to make it more addictive, tranquilizing, or even toxic without the consumer knowing until it’s too late.
Christopher Hendon, an assistant professor of chemistry at the University of Oregon, and also hoping to be able to pick up the gold fillings with Atomo!, says, “I sincerely hope that the product is excellent, and they can figure out a way to navigate the difficult space of selling a concoction that is perceived to be similar to that of coffee. The chemistry of it all is definitely interesting.”
So was the chemistry at Bhopal, Chernobyl, and Dachau.