I Think I Have Gas

TWENTY-FIVE CENTS OVERNIGHT. That’s how much the price of a gallon of gasoline went up since yesterday. I wonder if the owner of the gas station had to send in an additional Quarter to his supplier for every gallon of gas already in his underground tanks?

I doubt it.

I can’t speak for conditions in other cities, but here in Terre Haute (That’s French for, “Didn’t this used to be called a ‘Service Station’?”) the price of gasoline changes almost on an hourly basis.

At 7 AM let’s say it is $1.00/gal (For discussion purposes only.). At 9 AM it is $1.27. Come by over the lunch hour – $1.45. At 2 PM – $3.79. By 5 PM it might be back at $1.15/gal. There is no sense to it at all. I suspect that there is someone who is spinning a big wheel – like the one on “The Price is Right” TV show. Wherever the wheel stops, that is the price until the next spin.

I think Drew Carey is setting our gasoline prices.

When I was still gainfully employed I had to fill up the car at least once a week. The job had me on the road all day, every day. Now that I am retired I don’t drive nearly as much. Now I pull up to the pump once in three weeks or so. Being a person who keeps an eye on what is going on around him I have noticed a trend when it comes to the changing gasoline prices.

When the prices begin to change they do so going from South to North. The South end of town sees the changes first. The stations down near Boot City (Where you can still buy boxing gloves for your chickens) are the first to hear from Drew Carey. If the prices start up at Noon down South, by Suppertime the prices at the North end of town – up near the venue where you can have your wedding reception and a bowling tournament at the same time will be higher.

The price of gas also follows another suspicious pattern. The highest price is always on Monday morning. After that, as the week progresses, the price will drop by a penny or two every few hours. Come Sunday morning it will be at its lowest point in the week. Then by sunrise on Monday – POOF! – the price is up again.

I’m sure that all of these machinations and price swings are the result of changes in the price of crude oil in the Persian Gulf. It is totally beyond anyone’s control – just like elections in Chicago.

There are more and more Electric vehicles on the road that rarely use good old fashioned gasoline. It makes the drivers of those cars feel good about themselves as they plug in to recharge their batteries – until they learn that the current they are pumping into their cars is generated by burning oil and other fossil fuels.

As I get older I let them live in their fantasy. I’m just an old softy. If they aren’t buying gasoline I don’t have to wait in a line to fill my own tank. I try to wait until Saturday to get my fuel. It also gives me an excuse to go down South – coincidentally near Five Guys Burgers.

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