No Chafing Allowed
THE PLANE LANDS AND WE GO HOME. Our luggage arrives the next day. That seems to be part of a more frequently occurring pattern lately.
Yup, this is a follow-up to a post from last week.
Sometimes it is our fault. Sometimes it is the airline’s fault. Sometimes it is beyond anyone’s control. It is Fate, Kismet, Dumb Luck.
Being mere human beings, we are flying around in defiance of the laws of physics, gravity, and some guy named Murphy things are bound to go wrong every so often. All we can do is to try to prepare to sidestep the inevitable.
This brings us to why I have underwear in my carry-on computer bag.
There have been too many days when I have found myself wearing the same shorts for two days in a row because our luggage is vacationing elsewhere. Call me a Fussbudget, but I like to change clothes every day – especially my undies.
When faced with the prospect of multi-day shorts I suppose that I could “Go commando” as they say, but denim and my “ever-so-tenders” don’t mix well. Some truly nasty chafing could bring down civilization if we’re not careful.
To combat this problem of what to do when the calendar and my lack of fresh underwear collide I have taken to following the lead of my wife, the lovely and intensively creative, Dawn, who first suggested that we take desperate measures.
Now, this very instant, wadded up into a ball and cuddling up next to a couple of jump drives and a power cord is a bright red pair of men’s briefs – not boxers or thongs, but briefs – and they are clean just waiting to be called into action should their brethren be misplaced in transit.
Nearby, also in my computer case, over there, next to my Kindle, also rolled into a ball is a clean pair of socks. I don’t believe in halfway measures.
If my underwear gets lost, chances are that my socks are close by feeling seduced and abandoned by the airline baggage handlers.
A couple of years ago on a trip down to Texas we arrived in Corpus Christi to learn that our bags were partying it up in New Orleans. I’ve never been to New Orleans, but my clothes have. I kind of resent that. My pants were having a better time than I was. Given the circumstances I felt put upon and instead of dressing in my usual casual, yet acceptable in most third world countries, I spent the first two days looking like I had taken advantage of every K- Mart Blue Light Special in Texas. Eventually our bags arrived from New Orleans.
Y’ know, I never did get a satisfactory explanation of where those beads in my shorts came from.
Now that I carry extra socks and undies in my carry-on, TSA comments be damned, I can stay fresh and chafe-free. This doesn’t solve the overall missing luggage problem.
One possible solution is to UPS or Fed Ex our things directly to our final destination. It will cost us a few bucks, but it will all get there.
Another answer might be to travel like the Rich and Famous – pack nothing and buy everything once we arrive. That could get expensive and, in our Texas destination (A town of 5,665 people) there are limited shopping opportunities unless I want to dress either like a cowboy or the fry cook at Whataburger.
The search for answers continues.
Down the Hall on Your Left 
John, have you tried just turning a pair inside-out to get an extra day? Even if they’re not lost, John, think of the hot water washes you save. See, I’ve turned it into an environmental friendly issue.
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