I Need Protection
I CAN’T HELP IT. Deep down in the core of my being I am a nerd. I know that on my surface – what the world sees – I am this Super Cool, Hip, Macho, and Stylish Dude, but… You’re not buying this are you?
The only part of those words listed above that are true are that I am a nerd. I, unfortunately, have documentation to prove it.
I just recently bought myself a Pocket Protector.
I needed it.
I don’t wear short sleeve dress shirts. I do not have tape holding my glasses together and I rarely snort when laughing.
My new Pocket Protector is going on the inside pocket of my Uber-Macho leather (Pleather) jacket. I needed the Pocket Protector because one of my “4 for a Buck” Dollar Store ballpoint pens poked a hole in the lining of the pocket and the pen slipped down behind the Super-Hipster lining of the jacket. It took me twenty minutes to get my pen back.
Ergo – I need a real Pocket Protector.
At first I scoured the Dollar Stores, but even they had moved on and no longer carried them. I
was getting desperate to the point that I was forced to make my own out of half of a business size paper envelope. It worked for a while until it too succumbed to my bad habit of forgetting to retract the point on my pen. You can only poke so many holes in a paper Pocket Protector before there is a catastrophic failure and you end up chasing pens around the lining of the jacket again.
I finally got my coveted Pocket Protector from that source of all things bright and beautiful – Amazon.
In truth I was looking for a new wallet when the thunderbolt of inspiration hit me and I typed in “Pocket Protectors.” It took me to Nerd Nirvana. Try it for yourself.
When I hit the “Enter” key it presented me with “Over 100,000 results.” I swooned.
Amazon teased me with Plastic, Vinyl (What’s the difference?), Genuine Leather, and a variety of colors. It would drive a person with severe OCD right over the edge.
Amazon had Pocket Protectors coming out of their ears and I, at last, decided to go upscale. Since my jacket was leather I bought leather Pocket Protector.
I bought THREE Pocket Protectors.
One was all that I really needed, but according to the product description I will be getting – and I quote – “Package includes 3 pc soft PU leather pocket protector (sic).” I didn’t know what that “PU” stood for. I was a bit concerned, and even though the package has three pieces it described them in the singular. That is my nerdness kicking in – worrying over nothing.
My three Pocket Protectors in Genuine soft PU leather are in Black, Brown, and Blue. I have never seen Genuine Blue leather anywhere, soft PU or otherwise. That PU thing was really concerning me. A short dive into intensive research gave me the answer. The PU stands for PolyUrethane so now the words “Genuine” and “Leather” enter the realm of doubt.
I ordered my Pocket Protectors on a Monday evening and I was promised delivery on Thursday – along with my new wallet. I can hardly wait.