Back Home Again In Indiana

“LUCY, I’M HOME”

OK, so I don’t really know anybody named Lucy, but we are home – back in lovely Terre Haute (That’s French for “You don’t have an accent anymore.”)

After about ten days in the deep south we have crawled our way back north, into the land of, if not milk and honey, then Half and Half and Sweet n’ Low.

I do have to admit that our hosts fed us well, but now it is time for us to reclaim that wayward belt notch. If you are going to be staying on a college campus for any length of time you are going to be eating like a college student. I could do that when I was twenty, but now my ability to metabolize all of that is strictly Emeritus.

I still have the appetite and the willpower of a juvenile when it comes to food, but not the digestive tract. What am I to do when the College Dining Room puts out a mountain of pizza twice a day? At least they skipped it for breakfast.

All of that and the overwhelming proximity of a Waffle House on every major intersection made our time in the South enough to have Dr. Atkins spinning in his grave like a Mississippi Majorette.

While our time at the Annual Church Meeting was thoroughly enjoyable on many levels it is good to be back home. Where else but home can you scratch yourself in the middle of a conversation on the nature of Divine Inspiration? Where else could you decide to spend the entire day without shoes? No place I know.

I think that the Toyota is happy to be back home again in Indiana. It may have been feeling a bit intimidated by all those pick-up trucks down South. I swear it must have been 20 to 1 in favor of pick-up trucks no matter where we went. Where do people put the kids when they travel? Do they just Fed Ex them ahead or what? Seeing all of those pick-up trucks goes to prove that some clichés have a basis in fact.

The part of Georgia that we visited was where the movie “Deliverance” was filmed some 40 odd years ago. The locals are still milking that for all it’s worth. I saw several advertising signs mentioning that film just to remind visitors. Personally, I don’t think that is such a good idea. “Deliverance” wasn’t a musical comedy. I’d bet that the local Chamber of Commerce would just as soon forget that movie.

But, past all obstacles, traffic jams, and tempting menus we are home. We were pleased to see that the house was just where we left it. No trees had fallen over and no army of squirrels had taken over the neighborhood. Per instructions, the Post Office held our mail (all of it this time) and actually delivered it as requested.

I had to make a quick run to the grocery store because there wasn’t anything in the fridge and we were not in the mood to order a pizza. In fact, it may be a while before I hit the speed dial to order another “Large, Thin Crust, Pepperoni, with Extra Cheese.”

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