What Can A Person Say?
SOME DAYS THERE’S NOTHING GOOD YOU CAN SAY.
We were in Texas for Christmas and New Year and less than three weeks later we were back. This time it was not for a celebration or holiday. This time it was for a funeral.
A phone call on a Saturday with the news that a niece had passed away – very suddenly and unexpected. And on Monday we start on our way back to Texas.
In her Thirties with a loving husband and a teenage son – and a diagnosis of MS. The cause of death was complications from the MS. So young.
The gathering for the funeral brought family from as far away as Alaska. How could you not be there?
Something like this shakes everyone to the core. My thoughts went to the husband and son. They both looked so very lost. It is going to take Time for them to find their footing in their new world. There is an abundance of Family for them, but it is Time that will slowly ground them again.
The Family has a number of children, no longer babies, but not yet adults. Many of them have experienced the loss of someone close – grandparents. This time it was different and some of them were shaken. This passing was the first time that they felt the death of someone who was their parent’s age. Someone they used to visit with and be silly with. Someone who was a Mommy, not a Grandma. Someone who was young enough to be cool. It was hard enough for the grownups to deal with, for the kids it was earthshaking. Some of them withdrew into themselves to sort it out. Others played, as if nothing had happened, but you could catch it in their eyes when they stopped. Others clung to their mothers.
With the funeral on Wednesday we stayed until Friday – hugging and kissing and watching for an opportunity to offer the right words of comfort to the son and to his father.
I never knew what to say or when. I was at a loss for anything that didn’t sound…pointless. I didn’t want to open my mouth and have something like that come out, so I said very little. I just hugged and gently kissed them both.
We are home now and getting back into our routine. Nothing has changed here. Except we have an added memory and a new concern for those left behind in Texas.