Down the Hall on Your Left

This site is a blog about what has been coasting through my consciousness lately. The things I post will be reflections that I see of the world around me. You may not agree with me or like what I say. In either case – you’ll get over it and I can live with it if it makes you unhappy. Please feel free to leave comments if you wish . All postings are: copyright 2014 – 2017

Throwback Thursday Throws It Back

In an effort to be considered a “Hip” and “With it” guy I’m going to resurrect a posting for today that ran a year ago. It is “Throwback Thursday” I’ve been told.

Just don’t hate me because I’m beautiful. From November 25, 2014.

“Significant Signal Leakage”

 There was a knock on the door one day last week. It was a uniformed young man from the Cable Company. His van was parked at the curb with a very large ladder strapped to the top.

The fellow politely introduced himself and stated that there had been a report of a, “Significant Signal Leakage,” reported at our address and he had been sent to investigate and correct the problem. The big ladder was so he could check the connections on the pole along the backyard fence.

He didn’t look like he was about to pull off a home invasion or an attempt to steal my 2002 Hyundai, so my response was, to paraphrase, “Whatever.”

He extended his ladder up against the pole by the fence and scampered up. I saw several squirrels eyeing him enviously. He spent a good twenty minutes putzing around up there, knocking out our cable connection in the process. I was going to miss the Jeopardy! rerun. Life goes on. I should feel blessed – after all, there are people in Bulgaria who never get to see Jeopardy!

When he finished up in the backyard he moved his ladder over to the side of the house to check on the connection at that end. He seemed to be determined to stop that “Significant Signal Leakage” before it became a deluge.

Eventually he seemed satisfied, packed up his ladder, climbed back into his van and drove away. He gave us no reassurance that he had fixed the problem or that we were in no imminent danger. The TV came back on, but Jeopardy! was long gone. I’ll get over it.

Shift the scene to the next morning. I am sitting in the Chapel at St. Arbucks having my coffee when one of the Usual Suspects enters and comes over near me. This young fellow, with a Significant Southern Accent Leakage, works for the Cable Company. I told him about his co-worker’s visit of the day before and I asked him, “What does ‘Significant Signal Leakage’ mean?”

He laughed so hard I thought he was going to drop both his coffee and his accent.

“My friend,” he said, “It doesn’t mean anything. It’s just a high tech sounding phrase we use when we don’t want to bother explaining what the real problem is. From what you told me it sounds like we just had a loose connection somewhere. ‘Significant Signal Leakage’ – I just love those jokers.”

It is a good sounding phrase – “Significant Signal Leakage.” I may start using it myself. When I feel the need to return an undercooked steak I can claim that it has “Significant Signal Leakage.” When my doctor asks me how I’m feeling I can respond with, “I think I have Significant Signal Leakage.”At St. Arbucks when the barista asks me, “How are you this morning?” I can say, “I have ‘Significant Signal Leakage,’ please add an extra shot of espresso.”

Feel free to use this phrase if you wish. I don’t have it copyright protected or anything. I doubt that the Cable Company has either.

 

Advertisements

Single Post Navigation

2 thoughts on “Throwback Thursday Throws It Back

  1. Excellent! Since I wasn’t a “Subscriber” a year ago, this is the first time I had seen it. Thanks.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I’m glad you enjoyed it. I think I’ll keep “Throwback Thursday” in the game plan.

    John

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: