We Who Are About To Dine, Salute You
TODAY IS THE DAY AFTER THANKSGIVING – the day when people everywhere in this country are sleeping off an overdose of Tryptophan.
Turkey meat is chock full of tryptophan – a glorious endorphin that can make us relaxed, drowsy, and missing the second half of that football game we had planned on watching.
The guests who were invited to join in the dining event have all gone home, many with plates full of sliced turkey and stuffing in hand – “Care Packages” we used to call them.
Today is also a day filled with “Leftovers,” the remnants of yesterday’s feast. There are tons of Turkey Meat – White and Dark, 7000 different recipes of stuffing (Called stuffing whether it ever saw the inside of a bird or not.), Green Bean Casserole, Cranberry Sauce (something I’ve never taken a shine to) and a kaleidoscope of miscellaneous side dishes. Refrigerators everywhere are filled with all of this stuff – just waiting for the next round of gluttony.
There will be turkey omelets for breakfast, cold turkey sandwiches for lunch, and hot turkey sandwiches for dinner. Some may enjoy variations upon the theme, but the leit motif will be unchanged. I knew someone who loved the Day After dining so she could make stuffing sandwiches. Stuffing Sandwiches? – That’s bread between two slices of bread. It does not appeal to me. Never did, never will. It’s like chowing down on sugar coated sugar.
As I have aged, my digestive abilities have changed to allow less adventuresome dining. Of course, having my gall bladder removed has contributed to this altered state. The mere thought of some of these postprandial gut busting meals is enough to launch a symphony of noises in my stomach. Phillip Glass would be envious. He needs a piano to compose his works. I need only a hot turkey sandwich with a side of stuffing, and green bean casserole, finished off with pumpkin pie hidden beneath a mountain of Cool-Whip non-dairy topping at noon on the day after Thanksgiving.
I think that fluttering feeling coming from my innards is my liver waving a white flag of surrender.
Yesterday we had a lovely Thanksgiving meal at a friend’s home. Things never got out of control. I felt no obligation to sample everything in sight. I was able to drive us home without falling asleep at the wheel, and this morning for breakfast I had a two course meal – coffee and a newspaper. For lunch I may have some rice – just rice, not rice pilaf, not rice salad, not fried rice – just rice. And then, at some point in the day, I will excuse myself, go to the euphemism down the hall on my left and proceed to kill fish a hundred miles downstream.
For dinner tonight I may actually have some of the leftovers that we brought home – our very own “Care Package.” A plate with some warmed up turkey and stuffing, maybe some of that green bean thing, and maybe (And it’s a BIG maybe) I’ll have piece of pumpkin pie, sans topping of any sort. Neat, clean, and far short of a gastrointestinal Armageddon.
Don’t you just love the Holidays?