Success Breeds Something
A COUPLE OF WEEKS AGO I conducted an experiment with this blog. After a lengthy fact finding mission into darkest WordPress I discovered that the blogs with the largest following offered either recipes or advice on whatever.
So – I included both in a posting to see if it would draw new followers to the blog. I can now report that during the interim weeks since the experiment we have welcomed ten new followers. I know, Big Whoop. Ten new followers still leaves us about 9,885 followers short of our goal.
The really big and successful blogs have 10,000 or more followers and I see no reason why we can’t get there, regardless of public outcries and good taste.
Today we will try again, using the same formula – recipes and advice – to see if this second posting might be the trigger to send us into the Blogosphere.
Here goes –
Today’s recipe: Bananas!
Head to your local supermarket produce section and search for the fruit that looks like what is in the picture above. That there is a banana – or as my wife, the lovely and culinary maven Dawn, calls them “Naners.”
Pick up a few “Naners,” take them home and peel them before eating. If you need instruction on how to do that I suggest that you go to Netflix and download any of the Johnny Weissmuller “Tarzan” movies, paying particular attention to the naner peeling technique of the chimpanzee named Cheetah.
(I have no idea why they named the chimp after a large predatory cat.)
Some people like to slice the naners over their cereal in the morning. I personally cannot condone the use of knives that early in the day, but use your own judgment. I take no responsibility, so don’t come crying to me when your bowl of corn flakes has sliced naners and a thumb.
Today’s Advice Tip –
Pay for the Bananas before you leave the supermarket.
Failure to pay for your bananas will result in setting off that annoying alarm when you try to leave the store in addition to the possibility that you may be tackled by an acne-farm of a bag boy named Todd. You don’t want that. I don’t want that. Not even Todd wants that.
Pay for your bananas, watch the Tarzan movie, and have a highly trained expert slice the naners over your corn flakes.
You deserve to have naners. Just don’t buy the brown naners. They’re yucky.
There we have it. Another recipe and some heartfelt advice.
If you think the Advice part is inadequate remember this – Dear Abby is dead, so is her sister. Heloise is dead. Even Mr. Food is dead, so cut me some slack. At least you and I are alive.
Now we have to wait and see if the new followers come storming the gates to get in. We only need those additional 9,885 newbies to put us over the top.
If you like this blog tell your friends!
If you don’t like it tell your enemies!
If you’re neither here nor there about it you don’t know anybody anyway, so just keep it to yourself.